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Negotiation.md

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Negotiation

Negotiation is a dialogue between two or more people or parties intended to reach a beneficial outcome over one or more issues where a conflict exists with respect to at least one of these issues. [10]

Advices

Prepare for negotiation

  • Do your homework (research the other side): collect information / data on price, salary, cost, etc. [29] [31] [34]
  • Make a list of items you want from negotiation and why; define your goals and interests clearly. [32] [13] [34]
  • Make a list of your current position / contributions. [33] [34]
  • Make sure the person you are negotiating with has the authority to commit to what you want; if they don’t, don’t negotiate. [29]
  • Practice beforehand. [31]
  • Develop your BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement)

Process of negotiation

  • Aim high: The more you ask for, the more you’ll get, unless your demands are totally unreasonable. This has been confirmed by extensive research. Make a list of your goals and aspirations and set them high. [20] [29]
  • Ask (open-ended) questions. [32] [13]
  • Be fair: “Good negotiators should always think about how they can show the proposal they're making is fair to both parties”. [20]
  • Be prepared to walk away. [29]
  • Clarify any misconceptions. [13]
  • Diversify.
  • Have a bigger list - give up the nickels for the dimes. [26]
  • Have everyone agree on a mathematical formula to value an asset or service / Implement a number scale / Put numbers on things. [28] [26] [13]
  • Keep Quiet and Listen for Clues. [31]
  • Keep your statements brief. [13]
  • Know and control deadlines. [29]
  • Know your bottom line. [23]
  • Know your value. [32]
  • Label your feelings. [13]
  • Listen and respond, but don't interfere. [34]
  • Make the first move / offer (Anchor) and then adjust. [30] [13]
  • Pause - encourages the other party to speak-up. [13]
  • Share information. [13]
  • Stay calm and don't argue. [31]
  • Strike a power pose. body language [25]
  • Take a break / Go for a walk. [13]
  • Try not to make the first concession. Whoever makes the first one usually gives away more than the other party. Make concessions small, and make them slowly. The opponent should really earn them with lots of persuasion. Never make a concession without getting one back in return. [29]
  • Use active listening. [21]

"Standard techniques of good listening are to pay close attention to what is said, to ask the other party to spell out carefully and clearly exactly what they mean, and to request that ideas be repeated if there is any ambiguity or uncertainty." - from "Getting to yes"

  • Use your emotional intelligence. [13]
  • When in doubt, shut up! [29]
  • Speak about yourself, not about them

"Say 'We feel discriminated against' rather than 'You're a racist.'" - from "Getting to yes"

Result of negotiation

  • Get it in writing: Document what you agree on. [34] [29]

Salary negotiation

Tips

  • Talk about your value: have a list of items
  • Do a market research
  • Give a number not a range

Deadlines / Due dates / Projects

  • Use Scotty Principle: When asked how long a job will take, estimate the time required to complete the job, add about 25% - 50% onto that estimate, and commit to the longer estimate. [27]
  • Deal in deliverables, not deadlines. [27]
  • Keep the details to yourself until asked. [27]

Types [10]

  • Distributive negotiation / Zero sum game,
  • Integrative negotiation / Non-zero-sum game / Win-win game / Expand the Pie [31]

Techniques [10]

  • Put yourself in their shoes
  • Discuss each other's perceptions
  • Find opportunities to act inconsistently with his or her views
  • Face-saving
  • Listening
  • Speak for a purpose

"Before making a significant statement, know what you want to communicate or find out, and know what purpose this information will serve." - from "Getting to yes"

Conflict styles [10]

  • Accommodating
  • Avoiding
  • Collaborating
  • Competing
  • Compromising

Types of negotiators: Soft, Hard, Principled [10]

"The soft negotiator wants to avoid personal conflict and so makes consessions readily to reach agreement." - from "Getting to yes"

"The hard negotiator sees any situation as a contest of wills in which the side that takes the more extreeme positions and holds out longer fares better. He or she wants to win;" - from "Getting to yes"

"a way neither hard nor soft, but rather both hard and soft. The method of principled negotiation developed at the Harvard Negotiation Project is to decide issues on their merits rather than through a haggling process focused on what each side says it will and won't do. It suggests that you look for mutual gains whenever possible, and that where interests conflict, you should insist that the result be based on some fair standards independent of the will of either side. The method of principled negotiation is hard on the merits, soft on the people. It employs no tricks and no posturing." - from "Getting to yes"

Tactics [10]

  • Auction
  • Brinksmanship
  • Bogey
  • Chicken
  • Defence in Depth
  • Deadlines
  • Flinch
  • Good Guy/Bad Guy
  • Highball/Lowball
  • The Nibble
  • Snow Job
  • Mirroring

"Mirrors work magic. Repeat the last three words (or the critical one to three words) of what someone has just said. We fear what’s different and are drawn to what’s similar. Mirroring is the art of insinuating similarity, which facilitates bonding." - "Never split the difference", Chris Voss.

  • Scotting

Strategies

  • 15-20 Percent Rule. [31]
  • Cooperation and competition [34]

Dealing with emotions [10]

  • Make emotions explicit and validate
  • Allow time to let off steam
  • Symbolic gestures

Principled Negotiation [11]

  • Separate the people from the problem
  • Focus on interests, not positions
  • Invent options for mutual gain
  • Insist on using objective criteria

Tips & Tricks

When we move every potential acquisition to the “it would be nice”, it means we know we have the power to walk away from a negotiation at any point. When we’re negotiating for a “it would be nice” item, we’re tapping into logic and keeping most emotions—those things that make us act in goofy and unpredictable ways—at bay. It turns us from suckers to deal makers because we become more patient, self-assured and less likely to look for the quick fix. [12]

Want to know how strongly you or your counterpart wants something? Put a number on it. A number 1, for example is neutral, and 10 would be something you can’t live without. Hopefully this will lead to both parties eventually comprising or coming up with an alternative. This has allowed me in the past to be very direct with the other party in letting them know what I’m not willing to leave on the table. [13]

Tell a story. Negotiators have an easier time controlling their expressions when they’re talking. So don’t ask too many open questions. Instead describe what you want or share an anecdote about another negotiating partner who shared concerns similar to theirs and watch how they respond as they listen. Their guard will lower a little and you’ll be able to see their honest reactions to what you’re saying — knowledge to guide the rest of the conversation. [14]

As soon as you ask for a specific deal—10 percent off, $50 off—you set a limit... If you make it clear you’re looking to save but don’t say anything specific, it allows the salesperson the space to come up with their own creative way to help you. [15]

count to three or five in your head before you respond to anything. [17]

An indaba is designed to allow every party to voice its opinion, but still arrive at a consensus quickly. It works because opinions and arguments can only be aired in a particular way... Instead of repeating stated positions, each party is encouraged to speak personally and state their “red lines,” which are thresholds that they don’t want to cross. But while telling others their hard limits, they are also asked to provide solutions to find a common ground. [18]

...say the statement: “It seems like there’s nothing you can do.” People do not like to feel powerless, what it does is it makes the other side feel like they might be somewhat powerless. They’re going to want to search for answers. And certainly for someone higher than you in the hierarchy, the last thing they want to look to you, a subordinate, is to look powerless. It threatens their identity and authority. They’re not going to be comfortable saying yes to that. [19]

Time also plays a role. In negotiations, the side with the most time generally has an advantage. Patience pays. No matter how pressed you are, you should always keep your cool, maintaining an appearance of calm. "Your deadline is of your own making," Cohen writes. Don't ignore deadlines, but don't follow them blindly, either. [22]

Steps leading to negotiation [23]

  • Identify the problem
  • Research the issues
  • Select participants
  • Research participants
  • Prepare for negotiation
    • separate facts from assumptions
    • validate facts
    • validate assumptions
    • test assumptions
    • adjust strategies
  • meet participants
  • establish parameters of situation

Uncover hidden agendas [23]

  • Think like reporter
  • Question responses
  • Gather and digest the responses
  • Observe the non-verbal reactions

TODO: To process

Books

Sources