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ApplyingToCollege-1568227970-d2v05v.json
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{
"sid": "d2v05v",
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/",
"title:": "I overheard my mom crying on the phone today because she wanted me to go to Harvard and I was rejected... even though I'll be starting at Northwestern in a few days",
"text": "Made a throwaway to tell this story, since I really need a place to vent right now. Orientation at Northwestern starts super late due to the quarter system, so I've just been chilling at home while all my other friends have left for college. While I was watching TV in the living room last night, I thought I heard my mom say my name while she was on the phone in her bedroom. I was curious so I eavesdropped a little, and that's when I heard my mom sobbing \"all I wanted was for (insert my name here) to go to Harvard, but he wasn't good enough.\" I don't know who she was talking to, but I'm assuming it was to a relative or a friend, since my mom is part of the Chinese community in my town that loves to gossip about college and especially about which colleges their kids will be attending. I left at that point and don't really know how I've been feeling since, and I guess that's why I'm venting here. \n\n \n\nSo basically, my parents are both from China and met while they were both graduate students at Harvard. Ever since I was young, they constantly made it clear to me that Harvard was the only school that they wanted me to attend. Basically everything they made me do was to make me a more competitive applicant and increase my chances of getting into Harvard. They built up this expectation that I'd follow their legacy and didn't even consider that I might not get in. Fast forward to last December, and I found out I was deferred after applying early action. My parents were clearly disappointed, but still held out hope that I'd be accepted in the regular admissions cycle. Then, on decision day, I got my rejection letter and couldn't even look my parents in the eye. After getting all my decisions, I considered my choices and decided to attend Northwestern.\n\n \n\nEver since, I could tell that they've been disappointed in me, even though they never said it to my face. It was always small comments like \"oh I heard (insert name here) from your school got into Harvard, what do you think they did that you didn't?\" or \"I think Northwestern's a good school, but it's not in the same league as Harvard.\" Hearing my mom literally cry on the phone because I didn't get into Harvard was the confirmation I needed that they were, in fact, disappointed in me as their son. I'm sorry Mom, that I wasn't good enough to get into Harvard. I really fucking tried, okay? Northwestern's a good school too, I wish you could be happy that I was going there instead. \n\n \n\nOkay, rant over, thanks for listening.",
"author": "sorryItriedokay",
"created": 1568227970,
"updated": 1634075373,
"over_18": false,
"upvotes": 3079,
"upvote_ratio": 0.97,
"comments": {
"ezwzhbv": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezwzhbv/",
"text": ":( i'm sorry you had to go through that\n\ni'm not sure what else to say, other than that you'll be on your own path at Northwestern so you can go kick ass there!",
"author": "waysky20",
"created": 1568228627,
"upvotes": 872,
"replies": {
"ezx0htl": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx0htl/",
"text": "Thanks :). I really do feel a lot better after venting, and I'm so excited to start the next phase of my life.",
"author": "sorryItriedokay",
"created": 1568229289,
"upvotes": 321,
"replies": {
"ezx6jxm": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6jxm/",
"text": "This post brought me back to a time in my life when I dropped out of college and I got into a screaming match with my mom 20 years over it.\n\nWe're good now.\n\nParents want the best for you, and obviously you have some cultural issues you're running into right now with your mom. The reason I tell my sliver of a story is because while she may be expressing disappointment right now, that it likely doesnt have a bearing with your future with your mom. You'll want to confront this memory eventually down the line directly with her in the distant future to resolve it fully.\n\nBut remember you arent the stupid college you attend. And you arent a failure for this. Even if you fuck up like I did and drop out, you are still worthy and valid and dont let anyone, INCLUDING YOURSELF, tell you otherwise.",
"author": "Vaiden_Kelsier",
"created": 1568233193,
"upvotes": 91,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxp6bp": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxp6bp/",
"text": "You should be excited! As another Chinese guy who had to go to therapy for the one and only time in his life due to the stress of college admissions, it makes me happy to see you handling this in a healthy manner. My parents went to Stanford/Berkeley and I was terrified that I wouldn't get into a school that measured up. I'm sorry you have to deal with this from your parents. Just keep reminding yourself that Northwestern is a great school and you chose it because it'll make you happy.",
"author": "WaluigiIsTheRealHero",
"created": 1568246096,
"upvotes": 30,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezwzz3i": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezwzz3i/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568228955,
"upvotes": 308,
"replies": {
"ezx0gd0": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx0gd0/",
"text": "Thanks. Hearing that from someone is really what I need right now.",
"author": "sorryItriedokay",
"created": 1568229263,
"upvotes": 113,
"replies": {
"ezx177m": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx177m/",
"text": "Northwestern is a great school and maybe you didnt get into Harvard because too many celebrities bought their kids way in right then \ud83d\ude02. Just saying you would think post controversy your parents would have enough sense to understand that Harvard is just another school. Sure they are ivy league but they are certainly not the only ivy league school. Be proud, I am proud of you and your hard work deserves to be recognized \ud83d\ude01",
"author": "RealMsDeek",
"created": 1568229748,
"upvotes": 68,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezx6g4t": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6g4t/",
"text": "Real talk right here! As a fellow Chinese American, this post and these comments are just so relatable, so know that you\u2019re not alone. In time, I hope you\u2019ll receive all the recognition you deserve, OP :)",
"author": "Saeyrah",
"created": 1568233126,
"upvotes": 16,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezwzuyb": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezwzuyb/",
"text": "It is a lot harder to get into Harvard than it was 20+ years ago.",
"author": null,
"created": 1568228881,
"upvotes": 662,
"replies": {
"ezx1rfk": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx1rfk/",
"text": " This is so true, and so many out of touch people do not realize this. You\u2019d be shocked at how many think one should just apply on a whim when one knows that one has no chance. It\u2019s dumb.",
"author": "Hardlymd",
"created": 1568230111,
"upvotes": 285,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx1vad": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx1vad/",
"text": "Back then it was much easier for Asians to get in then it is now too",
"author": "ThreeBrokenArms",
"created": 1568230181,
"upvotes": 179,
"replies": {
"ezx6blz": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6blz/",
"text": "And they also got in for grad school lmao",
"author": "whitelife123",
"created": 1568233046,
"upvotes": 153,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx4nzj": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx4nzj/",
"text": "Just change your name to Jamal Washington and you're guaranteed to get in.",
"author": "CVS_is_unsafe",
"created": 1568231981,
"upvotes": 66,
"replies": {
"ezx69p3": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx69p3/",
"text": "you dropped your /s bud, too bad the internet can't detect sarcasm\n\nedit: I commented this when u/CVS_is_unsafe's comment was being downvoted",
"author": "LRFE",
"created": 1568233012,
"upvotes": 27,
"replies": {
"ezxg825": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxg825/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568239691,
"upvotes": 5,
"replies": {
"ezxpnwv": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxpnwv/",
"text": "b r u h\n\nhe's clearly making a joke about AA. Obviously it's true that AA benefits URMs, but it's not accurate that URM by itself will get you in lmao",
"author": "LRFE",
"created": 1568246462,
"upvotes": 16,
"replies": {
"ezxv69b": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxv69b/",
"text": "He's asian and got into NWU. I'm sure if he was a URM he had a fair shot at harvard.",
"author": "alphawater1001",
"created": 1568250483,
"upvotes": 5,
"replies": {
"ezy1f2c": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy1f2c/",
"text": "I always wonder how Harvard could fill an entire class with valedictorians (while some schools send 20 kids) but instead they don't and some people think they know better than a university president (of the school that they desperately hope to go to). \n\nThen they wind up being extremely condescending to their URM classmates. Probably couldn't get into Stanford which has a higher acceptance rate and can't admit based off race. \n\nBut whatever helps you sleep at night.\n\nPlease downvote me all you want.",
"author": "SendMeYourHousePics",
"created": 1568255098,
"upvotes": -9,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezy1j6a": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy1j6a/",
"text": "Harvard is 6 percent black.\n\nI always wonder how Harvard could fill an entire class with valedictorians (while some schools send 20 kids) but instead they don't and some people think they know better than a university president (of the school that they desperately hope to go to). \n\nThen they wind up being extremely condescending to their URM classmates. Probably couldn't get into Stanford which has a higher acceptance rate and can't admit based off race. \n\nBut whatever helps you sleep at night.\n\nPlease downvote me all you want.",
"author": "SendMeYourHousePics",
"created": 1568255185,
"upvotes": -7,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezy75ka": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy75ka/",
"text": "It's hard for me to imagine them not being condescending to their URM classmates in HS and college. The percentage of Asian students varies from year to year. Don't you think if there was a quota it'd be consistent?\n\nHarvard is 6 percent black. X student probably couldn't get into Stanford which has a higher acceptance rate and can't admit based off the race. But instead, they X student pretends like they know better than the university president, or whoever decides admissions policies, ironically, of the school they desperately hope to go to.\n\nIt's so weak that people on this subreddit are acting willfully ignorant in the hope that this somehow goes to the super conservative supreme court and they'll get a broad ruling. \n\n\"*Some people* graduate, *but be still stupid*\"",
"author": "SendMeYourHousePics",
"created": 1568259803,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezx6h1b": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6h1b/",
"text": "No need to bring in race/AA to this... it was easier for everyone let alone their skin color. Let's keep it at that.",
"author": "Saiyan-Luffy",
"created": 1568233142,
"upvotes": -11,
"replies": {
"ezx8u0r": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx8u0r/",
"text": "Because people didn\u2019t care as much.",
"author": "KoalityBrawls",
"created": 1568234663,
"upvotes": 11,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezxfi4p": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxfi4p/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568239178,
"upvotes": 30,
"replies": {
"ezxgok4": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxgok4/",
"text": "It\u2019s so competitive because there are so many students and so few spots. There are tens of thousands of people with perfect scores and not that many spots at top schools.",
"author": "fmemate",
"created": 1568240022,
"upvotes": 18,
"replies": {
"ezxlhbr": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxlhbr/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568243415,
"upvotes": 8,
"replies": {
"ezxlllh": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxlllh/",
"text": "It comes down to your essays and extracurriculars",
"author": "fmemate",
"created": 1568243502,
"upvotes": 15,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezy05ky": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy05ky/",
"text": "That app. sounds like a waste of money to me. Unless you have something special that these kids don\u2019t? something reaaaally special...?",
"author": "lunayh",
"created": 1568254148,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {
"ezy20yy": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy20yy/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568255560,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {
"ezy2xhh": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy2xhh/",
"text": "Sure, I\u2019m down lol",
"author": "lunayh",
"created": 1568256259,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezx3gs8": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx3gs8/",
"text": "Bump",
"author": "Doc23977",
"created": 1568231208,
"upvotes": 12,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx2xh4": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx2xh4/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568230862,
"upvotes": 7,
"replies": {
"ezx7dol": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx7dol/",
"text": "they were in grad school as well. Unless they got into Harvard Med the admissions rates are way higher, including HLS and HBS",
"author": "Treesandskins",
"created": 1568233721,
"upvotes": 8,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezxqw6k": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxqw6k/",
"text": "Totally agree. I think your mom needs to appreciate you more. That\u2019s what mothers are for.",
"author": "TheMazeProject",
"created": 1568247370,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezx0kj0": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx0kj0/",
"text": "Congratulations on your admission to Northwestern!\n\nYou should be proud of the work you did, the effort you made, and everything else that went into that achievement.\n\nI don't know that it's like this for all parents, but I believe it is almost universal: The SINGLE THING I truly want for my three kids is that they find contentment, purpose, and happiness and that they know that I love them no matter what.\n\nWhether it's Harvard or Northwestern or some other life path you find yourself on, go forth with total confidence, pride, and passion.\n\nI truly believe that if you go and seize the day -- wherever you are -- your Mom will find satisfaction and will ultimately be proud of you (below the surface, she probably is already).\n\nSeeing you living a good and purposeful life will make her discover that Harvard wasn't right for you after all.\n\nAnd if you live that way, what your Mom or anyone else thinks of you won't matter that much in the grand scheme of your life. That's their issue, not yours.\n\nBest of luck with your adventure at Northwestern!",
"author": "DaveG55337",
"created": 1568229338,
"upvotes": 112,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx3thv": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx3thv/",
"text": "Northwestern is one of the best schools in the world. Tell your mom to stop making comments or you won't give her grandkids until she's 90",
"author": "Graphitetshirt",
"created": 1568231434,
"upvotes": 165,
"replies": {
"ezxfd23": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxfd23/",
"text": "Power move right here",
"author": "ReconnaisX",
"created": 1568239079,
"upvotes": 41,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezx3h6f": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx3h6f/",
"text": "I was reading like \u201cnorthwestern isn\u2019t good enough\u201d and I was all like HmMmmmm but then \n\n\u201cChinese\u201d\n\nAnd I was like, Ah.\n\nMe too. But my mom will be happy if I can get into U of M, which is what I\u2019m aiming for. Chinese parents tho lol.\n\nMy cousin goes to Northwestern tho. The campus is so fucking nice. I\u2019m definitely going to apply to the school and I do have a very comfortable Northwestern hoodie :)",
"author": "Andynisco",
"created": 1568231215,
"upvotes": 50,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx15vd": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx15vd/",
"text": "Awww, your username breaks my heart. :(\n\nI\u2019m glad that you got into Northwestern, you should be proud of yourself, and you parents should be proud too.\n\nDon\u2019t listen to what your mom is saying, this is your life, and you shouldn\u2019t feel ashamed of your accomplishments.\n\nI hope you feel better soon.",
"author": "Precalc_Sucks",
"created": 1568229723,
"upvotes": 39,
"replies": {
"ezx905o": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx905o/",
"text": "Hey your username is pretty relatable",
"author": "KoalityBrawls",
"created": 1568234774,
"upvotes": 12,
"replies": {
"ezx920e": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx920e/",
"text": "Haha ikr",
"author": "Precalc_Sucks",
"created": 1568234807,
"upvotes": 3,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezx17sv": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx17sv/",
"text": "I got accepted into the school of my dreams, but I chose to go to a state school so that I wouldn\u2019t have any debt coming out. I also chose it because the program for my major was way more organized and hands-on. My parents don\u2019t seem to see this; they just think I\u2019m lazy and don\u2019t want to try hard in college. My way of dealing with this is the fact that I don\u2019t need to see them for months at a time. I know it sounds terrible but I don\u2019t miss them most of the time. If they can\u2019t be proud of me for making a forward-thinking decision then I should be allowed to forget about them for a bit.",
"author": "Commercial_Hawk",
"created": 1568229759,
"upvotes": 90,
"replies": {
"ezx4070": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx4070/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568231555,
"upvotes": 25,
"replies": {
"ezx9g9m": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx9g9m/",
"text": "Not necessarily. Harvard, the other Ivy League schools, and many other \"top-tier\" schools provide VERY generous need-based aid.\n\nIn my son's case going to Stanford will cost him no more (and potentially WAY less) than any other place would.\n\nCost is just one factor and also varies widely from one student to the next.",
"author": "DaveG55337",
"created": 1568235066,
"upvotes": 35,
"replies": {
"ezx9tku": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx9tku/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568235311,
"upvotes": 12,
"replies": {
"ezxjusp": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxjusp/",
"text": "Thank you! He is incredibly passionate about learning and really driven by the unique opportunities there. He's one of the most interesting and well-rounded people I know. Lucky for me, I get to hang out with him a lot. lol\n\nI think you may want to look at the schools' financial aid pages more closely. Granted, \"middle class\" means a lot of different things to different people, but for all the Ivy League schools and Stanford, if your family has an annual income of $65,000 (I would say is \"lower income\" for a family), your expected contribution is ZERO. If your family makes $150,000 in income (which, to me, is what \"upper middle class\" is) your expected contribution is around **0-10% of your income**.\n\nOur family is very much \"middle class\" (nowhere near $150,000/year). Our out-of-pocket costs for 4 years at Stanford will be about $20,000 TOTAL. It would be far less without the required (for us) Cardinal Care medical insurance.\n\nAnyway -- it's a complicated thing to figure out, but the Ivy League schools have multi-billion dollar annual endowments that enable them to be very generous with scholarship/grant amounts for just about every family income level.",
"author": "DaveG55337",
"created": 1568242258,
"upvotes": 14,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezxelyz": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxelyz/",
"text": "My parents are the opposite, they told me not to even apply to the school of my dreams (NYU Tisch) not because they don\u2019t think I\u2019ll get in, but because they don\u2019t want me in a quarter of a million dollars in debt. Being a reasonable person I\u2019m listening to them and sticking to applying to cheaper schools. I think a lot of parents focus on having their child get the best possible education and forget about the massive amount of money it takes to do that.",
"author": null,
"created": 1568238566,
"upvotes": 7,
"replies": {
"ezy37ye": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy37ye/",
"text": "agreed. i went to a cheaper school for undergrad and then splurged on grad school. couldn\u2019t be happier.",
"author": "likearealreptile",
"created": 1568256487,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezx2spn": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx2spn/",
"text": "This is so unhealthy and almost a literal fetishization of schools. Please stay strong, it\u2019s a toxic environment.",
"author": "dlemr6",
"created": 1568230776,
"upvotes": 42,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx2iue": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx2iue/",
"text": "I'm so sorry you had to experience this. In short: that is INSANE for so many reasons. Northwestern is very selective and difficult to get into. Harvard is absolutely NOT necessarily the best school to go to as an undergraduate. It is an excellent school--no doubt (especially at the graduate level). But the USA is fortunate to have HUNDREDS of fantastic colleges, especially at the undergraduate level. In fact, depending on the individual, Harvard may be a terrible place to go. It might not be a good fit at all. It is much more likely that a different school is a better fit, given that there are thousands of other colleges out there, many hundreds of which offer superlative undergraduate educations. Not getting into Harvard in NO WAY means you are not \"good enough\". That's *absurd*. There are dozens of factors (too many to mention here) that go into admissions decisions.\n\nHere's a fact that may blow you away: if they wanted to, Harvard could fill their entire incoming freshman class with only valedictorians from the application pool they receive. In other words, they receive more applications from valedictorians alone than they have spots for. But they don't fill their freshman class with only valedictorians because of the aforementioned admission factors. If you got into Northwestern, you are KICKING ASS! Way to go! Sorry your mom is misinformed.",
"author": "gerntrash",
"created": 1568230602,
"upvotes": 38,
"replies": {
"ezx3nmr": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx3nmr/",
"text": "I am very familiar with Harvard. It would not have been a good fit for me; not at all. I went to a small liberal arts college that was a ***wonderful*** fit for me. My son goes to a completely different small liberal arts college that is the perfect fit for him. There is no such thing as The One Best College for all. That's a myth. Think about how absurd that idea is. Different people thrive in different environments. The college that is best for you is the college that is best for you. It's statistically unlikely that that place would be Harvard.",
"author": "gerntrash",
"created": 1568231330,
"upvotes": 9,
"replies": {}
},
"ezy1aas": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy1aas/",
"text": "EXACTLY THIS! I was so surprised that no one had posted this up until this point. Why the hell would Harvard automatically be the best? other than being able to say \u201cI attend/attended Harvard\u201d which connects you to Harvard \u201cprestige\u201d there\u2019s nothing special about it if you don\u2019t fit in or have the right programs, classes, majors, professors, friends, etc etc etc. it may even be bad for you; a coupling of the above reasons and tuition/dorm costs could result in a horrible overall experience. Hope you\u2019re not making these mistakes with northwestern and going there to make up for your \u201cnot being good enough to get into Harvard so at least my parents see I\u2019m not so bad\u201d. If, on the other hand, you\u2019re going for good reasons, then good for you, and enjoy!",
"author": "lunayh",
"created": 1568254998,
"upvotes": 5,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezx2bss": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx2bss/",
"text": "who gives a shit you're going to northwestern fuck harvard",
"author": "AdroitMan",
"created": 1568230476,
"upvotes": 51,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx4k3k": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx4k3k/",
"text": "Heyo, I'm also gonna be a freshman at NU this year! If you want to talk and complain about the quarter system together or parents who expect too much from you, I got you!",
"author": "JCPoly",
"created": 1568231912,
"upvotes": 11,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx3033": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx3033/",
"text": "i would literally kill to get into northwestern. i\u2019m extremely proud of you!!!!!!!!!",
"author": "CornEater64",
"created": 1568230909,
"upvotes": 10,
"replies": {
"ezx4emh": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx4emh/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568231815,
"upvotes": -7,
"replies": {
"ezx6gm6": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6gm6/",
"text": "yo issa hyperbole",
"author": "CornEater64",
"created": 1568233134,
"upvotes": 19,
"replies": {
"ezx6kay": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6kay/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568233200,
"upvotes": -5,
"replies": {
"ezxa33i": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxa33i/",
"text": "ok idk why you said anything about immorality when you understood the joke then. anyways though i\u2019m not obsessed over toxic school prestige culture\u2026 northwestern is nearby and i want to stay close to home. i love everything about their math program and how good they are with double majoring, plus the finaid i\u2019d get (compared to the shitty i\u2019d get from my state school). those are my reasons, not prestige. i appreciate ur message but pls don\u2019t make assumptions.",
"author": "CornEater64",
"created": 1568235484,
"upvotes": 10,
"replies": {
"ezxa94u": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxa94u/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568235592,
"upvotes": -7,
"replies": {
"ezxarng": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxarng/",
"text": "ohhhhh wowww. it\u2019s totally my bad for mistaking someone using an imperative phrase, in a situation where they\u2019re responding to me, as being directed at me. not so much of a r/woooosh as you think\u2026",
"author": "CornEater64",
"created": 1568235936,
"upvotes": 6,
"replies": {
"ezxc5iq": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxc5iq/",
"text": "[deleted]",
"author": null,
"created": 1568236872,
"upvotes": -6,
"replies": {
"ezxcfab": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxcfab/",
"text": "eh not mad. more sarcastic hehe.",
"author": "CornEater64",
"created": 1568237057,
"upvotes": 4,
"replies": {}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
},
"ezx1cjl": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx1cjl/",
"text": "Your forging your own path. I think it\u2019s rather beautiful that you are attending a different school rather than the one your parents attended, it makes you that much more different and unique. If your parents have made everything possible for you to be a strong applicant for Harvard I\u2019m assuming they have already made plans on how you should live your life. This however is not the case. At one point you\u2019ll learn and understand that your decisions can only be evaluated by you and you only-you\u2019ll be the only one that has to be content with your decisions. Even though it must hurt seeing your mother cry over your rejection of Harvard understand that your hard work has earned your a rightful spot at Northwestern and you know that.",
"author": "Fantastic_Baker",
"created": 1568229844,
"upvotes": 8,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx9u7x": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx9u7x/",
"text": "I'll be at Northwestern in a few days too. KEEP YOUR HEAD UP. When were out there on Lakefill watching the sun set with Chicago to our right, AINT NOBODY TELL US WHATS GOOD FOR US AND WHATS BAD, WHAT WE CAN OR CAN'T DO.",
"author": "copydex1",
"created": 1568235323,
"upvotes": 8,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx69wd": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx69wd/",
"text": "Congrats on getting into Northwestern. That's an accomplishment you should be proud of. Your parents will get over it and they still love you, no matter how hard they push you or how ridiculous their expectations. In their mind they're just trying to do their job of preparing you to be a successful adult...and maybe have a little bit of bragging rights. In the end what's important is what you want, so enjoy the hell out of college. Life is short, enjoy the journey and stop worrying about what others want or think. It's your time now.",
"author": "sdcyclonesurfer",
"created": 1568233015,
"upvotes": 6,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx22h0": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx22h0/",
"text": "As a person who has parents who really just want me to be happy/have a reliable career, is it not even possible to appeal to their emotions and love for you? Maybe by sitting them down and explaining your perspective to them? Id cry over this and I cant imagine a parent not understanding they f-ed up after a sitdown like that. Hope this isnt super tone-deaf but will accept judgment if I am.",
"author": "canigetuhhhlarge",
"created": 1568230310,
"upvotes": 5,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxnc1c": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxnc1c/",
"text": "#nolegacybutparentsstillexpectivyleaguegang",
"author": "jungofficial",
"created": 1568244741,
"upvotes": 4,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx2tbp": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx2tbp/",
"text": "You can definitely be successful from anywhere, and Northwestern is an outstanding school to be at! College is what you make of it, so work hard and have fun! Sounds like your mom doesn't have an open mind, and she seems crazy to not be proud of you.",
"author": "Badger_6",
"created": 1568230787,
"upvotes": 3,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx37wi": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx37wi/",
"text": "Aw I\u2019m so sorry that you have to go through this. My parents would cry tears of joy if I got accepted to school as good as Northwestern so you are definitely an amazing and hardworking person! If it makes you feel better, I\u2019ve seen plenty of people from my school get accepted to HYPSM schools and then get rejected by Northwestern (Northwestern accepts less people from my school than Harvard) so you were probably just unlucky with the admissions, not that you were not \u201cgood enough\u201d for Harvard.",
"author": "Bananasauce0",
"created": 1568231050,
"upvotes": 5,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx7aq5": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx7aq5/",
"text": "I want to point something out that some admission guy pointed out to a group of students at my school the other day that I really took to heart. There are 40,000 high schools in the US, and in each school there is 1 top student. Combining the number of people accepted to all Ivy League schools you get around 14,000. That means that even if you WERE the TOP student at your school, that still doesn\u2019t mean you will get in to an ivy. At this point it\u2019s honestly just a lottery",
"author": "sat-for-the-boys",
"created": 1568233669,
"upvotes": 4,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxfik6": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxfik6/",
"text": "Rest assured your parents are just out of touch. This isn't a failure. Northwestern is among the very best schools in the world, and stacks up favorably by any measure.\n\nHonestly the biggest damage done here is to your self esteem and your relationship with your parents - NOT your education, career, or future. So focus on getting over the disappointment and make the most of your time at NU. Also, take time to express your feelings to your parents and reconcile with them.",
"author": "ScholarGrade",
"created": 1568239186,
"upvotes": 3,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxgtww": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxgtww/",
"text": "So I went to Northwestern for undergrad and Harvard for grad school. I can tell you with absolute certainty that Northwestern is a fantastic school but most importantly, it was the right school for me. Fancy schools will not solve your problems, I know you know that, and maybe your parents can\u2019t understand, but the most important thing about undergrad is not the fancy name but what kinds of skills and experiences you build during that time. \n\nTry so many new things at NU, meet a ton of people, take risks and leave with a laundry list of things you know how to do. It\u2019s an amazing place so have a great time! Go Cats!",
"author": "ginkofree",
"created": 1568240128,
"upvotes": 4,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx3n7q": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx3n7q/",
"text": "Northwestern is an amazing school! Be proud that you got in there! Honestly, Northwestern is even better than Harvard in some areas and the acceptance rate is so close that the difference is small. And when you get out of college they are comparable enough that the advantage of going to an elite school when applying to jobs will be nearly the same for each school. Don\u2019t let what your mom said affect you. It\u2019s your future, not hers.\n\nAlso, like someone else said further up in the thread, it was much easier to get in when your parents applied. Not nearly as many kids applied to each college back then and the general academic level and list of accomplishments has improved greatly.\n\nBesides, if you really wanted to go to Harvard (you, not your parents, because that\u2019s what matters) you can always apply there for grad school.",
"author": "rampboatwtrgame",
"created": 1568231323,
"upvotes": 6,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx64vw": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx64vw/",
"text": "Some parents....If they give you grief about it, just ask them why they didn\u2019t get with the program and give Harvard $1 million?",
"author": "baycommuter",
"created": 1568232927,
"upvotes": 3,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxza9x": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxza9x/",
"text": "Your parents should be ashamed of themselves.",
"author": "IcyTempestUCLAbound",
"created": 1568253500,
"upvotes": 3,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx10js": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx10js/",
"text": "I'm sorry your parents are acting this way; it's really not fair to you. Getting into Northwestern is still a HUGE accomplishment and you and your parents should be proud of you!!!",
"author": "MelodicDesk",
"created": 1568229628,
"upvotes": 4,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx3s4p": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx3s4p/",
"text": "FWIW I\u2019m proud of you. Good luck at Northwestern!",
"author": "sailaway_NY",
"created": 1568231410,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxa4o7": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxa4o7/",
"text": "You couldn't look them in the eye because you weren't accepted to Harvard?!? Thats rough bro but keep your head up and everything in perspective. Northwestern is an amazing school by all accounts and there is a path for you in this world!",
"author": "nerdymen242424",
"created": 1568235512,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxfcoe": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxfcoe/",
"text": "as a fellow Asian i am so proud of you for going into northwestern you will probably flourish there \n\nyou do you man and honestly ur parents would have a lower chance getting into harvard in your shoes because it\u2019s so much harder to get into these days with these beasts achieving 1600 SAT and such",
"author": "thewingidingi",
"created": 1568239072,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxfgmx": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxfgmx/",
"text": "I\u2019m sorry you have to go through this OP, and all I can say is I\u2019m with you. I relate to this, it\u2019s always in the little things they say. I just transferred this year because I couldn\u2019t make it into my major and I keep hearing my parents trying to defend my decision, as if everyone were out to look down on it. Hopefully the best we can do is carry our heads high and do great wherever we are so that in the very end, they have no choice but to be fucking proud of us, right?",
"author": "sunburnacoustic",
"created": 1568239149,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxfhrx": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxfhrx/",
"text": "You are almost certainly \u201cgood enough\u201d for Harvard. It\u2019s just that they cant take everyone who\u2019s qualified and Im sorry your mom doesnt see that. Northwestern is an amazing school, congrats!! Make YOURSELF proud and take advantage of all the opportunities Northwestern has to offer<3 great job and good luck:)",
"author": "thisismyrappername_1",
"created": 1568239171,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxoea0": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxoea0/",
"text": "Hey, you are doing this for yourself and not your parents. You worked hard and got into an incredible school. You parents were Harvard graduates, they should know that Northwestern is top tier and that doesn\u2019t even matter. You did your best and your parents should be happy for wherever you go, as long as you worked hard. It disappoints me that you had to go through this.",
"author": "Antman-is-in-thanos",
"created": 1568245516,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxplje": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxplje/",
"text": "First world problems. You sound like an intelligent, sensitive person, so here's my best advice. Go to college to pursue the things you enjoy, and focus on making yourself happy. Don't let anyone else's baggage or expectations influence your decisions. You are going to pay a lot of money for what will hopefully be a transformational experience, make sure that you become the person you want to be by the end of it.",
"author": "TuggyBRugburn",
"created": 1568246413,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxq42k": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxq42k/",
"text": "Hey man look at the bright side. You\u2019re still going to an amazing school. The Northwestern campus is gorgeous and right by the lake. Downtown Evanston is far better than most college towns. \n\nAnd you\u2019re a $2 L ride away from the 3rd largest city in the US. \n\nPS Northwestern has a sailing class if you want to get out on Lake Michigan and learn an interesting skill. \n\nIf you\u2019re in to architecture Chicago has a ton of buildings open to the public for visiting. I suggest going up to see the Baha\u2019i temple just north of you. \n\nThe CTA is also giving a rare tour of their command center. Google Open House Chicago. \n\nYou want to watch some Halloween movies outdoors by a campfire by the lake? We do that too. \n\nNorthwestern is a great spot to be in to take your mind off that bullshit. There is so many great things to do around here and you don\u2019t need a car for any of it. The whole city is accessible for literally $2.",
"author": "Guinness",
"created": 1568246796,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxq5oa": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxq5oa/",
"text": "Even being over qualified for a school like Harvard only gets you a few lottery tickets to get in, so it's definitely not that you weren't good enough, you just weren't lucky this time, especially since you got into NW being that it's almost on the same level. Congrats btw, now the hard part truly begins but if you made it this far you'll kick ass at whatever you set your eyes on",
"author": "nviziblgeekjr",
"created": 1568246831,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxz09h": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxz09h/",
"text": "Same. I'm Chinese and my cousins all went to brilliant Ivy League schools. It's become painfully obvious throughout high school that i am not smart at all and will never be going to these colleges. I'm sure you know that college doesn't define who you are, but really understand that statement. You will be amazing no matter where you go.",
"author": "boyshaped",
"created": 1568253296,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezy1fmj": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy1fmj/",
"text": "So sorry you had to go through that, even though we may be internet strangers I am very happy for you and the direction you're going in. All the best at Northwestern \u2764\ufe0f",
"author": null,
"created": 1568255109,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx2sxs": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx2sxs/",
"text": "honestly you shouldn\u2019t feel guilty what the hell its completely not your fault it\u2019s your parents tbh",
"author": "men_loving_boy",
"created": 1568230780,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx2vgc": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx2vgc/",
"text": "It's alright man. Even if you didn't make it, try going there for grad school! Your parents didn't make Harvard as an undergrad, so you are totally fine and you can make it up. I'd die if I got into a school like Northwestern. Congratulations!",
"author": "eswaggy123",
"created": 1568230826,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxiint": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxiint/",
"text": "You're a person, not a trophy. Congrats on finding a college it sounds like you are happy with.\n\nIn this Information Age remember the only limit to your education is how much you choose to learn. The college you attend has less influence over that nowadays and it's sad your parents don't say that. Though that piece of paper you get at the end still matters to employers, once you get your foot in the door of your first job and start impressing them with your skills even that won't matter nearly as much as your accumulating knowledge and experience will. Good luck!",
"author": "The_MAZZTer",
"created": 1568241335,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxm2fp": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxm2fp/",
"text": "Hey bud,\n\nFuck the system. If your parents think that people who go/have gone to Harvard are the only people who will ever be happy, successful, or important, then they need a history lesson. For you, here is a list of very important people who did not go to a prestigious college:\n\n1. Bob Dylan\n2. Albert Einstein\n3. Jimmy Carter\n4. Martin Luther King, Jr.\n5. Malcolm X\n6. Thomas Edison\n7. Benjamin Franklin\n8. Christopher Columbus\n9. Warren Buffett\n10. Jesus\n11. Ernie, my driving school teacher, who yelled at a room full of people for making fun of my disability\n12. Me\n\nI'm sorry to say it, but if your parents were a little smarter, they would know that prestige doesn't count for anything outside of our social constructs that don't actually matter. They would also know that Northeastern is still a pretty big privilege flex. They would also know that you can get a great education pretty much anywhere; you get out of it what you put into it. They owe you a giant apology, and they owe smaller ones to me, my family, and everyone else who didn't/won't go to Harvard. They owe it to the world to change their outlook on prestige and human capabilities because they way they're acting now is hurting, to some extent, literally everybody who is alive right now. I'm so sorry this is happening to you.",
"author": "MicksWithoutPotatoes",
"created": 1568243842,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {
"ezxo4qi": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxo4qi/",
"text": "Good sentiment, but Jimmy Carter actually went to the US Naval Academy (which is quite prestigious and was even more so in the 1940s) and Albert Einstein went to ETH Zurich, the most prestigious school in continental Europe.",
"author": "FeltIOwedItToHim",
"created": 1568245322,
"upvotes": 6,
"replies": {}
}
}
},
"ezxrt1m": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxrt1m/",
"text": "man that really sucks. tbh some parents try to live vicariously through their kids and put tons of pressure on them to do near impossible things like get into Harvard. it's dumb. why harvard? besides a fancy title and bragging rights, what does Harvard have (besides controversy, elitist legacies, and preppy students) that any other top college like Northwestern doesn't? I'm just so confused about what it is about Harvard that makes it so special, and why they feel like you going there versus any other school is going to better you as a person in any way. All that matters is that you're happy, and I really hope that your parents' opinions don't start to rub off on you and make you regret going to Northwestern. If it makes you feel any better, my older sister goes to UChicago and my parents are obviously proud, but she has the worst relationship ever with my parents and she and my mom will probably never have a happy mother-daughter relationship ever again. See? Prestigious college education isn't everything! Have fun and kick ass at Northwestern!",
"author": null,
"created": 1568248022,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxvzx8": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxvzx8/",
"text": "I'm a grad student doing a second master's and working professional, completed a master's at a top 20 school for my field. \n\nDon't sweat it. Nobody gives a shit where you did undergrad.",
"author": "gottabequick",
"created": 1568251077,
"upvotes": 2,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx11nm": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx11nm/",
"text": "People need to u sweat and that the college you go to is not a matter of life or death. Your parents also need to be realistic and understand that no matter how good your application is college applications are pretty much a lottery. I\u2019m sorry that they are ignorant of reality, please do not take what they say to heart.",
"author": "yuvals03",
"created": 1568229648,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx1kc7": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx1kc7/",
"text": "Yo, I feel the quarter system pain man *UCLA 23'* But that sucks bro, my parents are somewhat similar but I don't pay too much attention to them -- in the regard of colleges and careers. Because parents don't always have to be right, you have the right to choose your own path and as long as you have an end goal and you know you're on track your parent's disappointment is just an unnecessary mental obstacle. Just do your thing and become who you would be proud of; and leave the rest to life, all things are sorted in due time",
"author": "lordsmobile6969",
"created": 1568229984,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx5xx9": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx5xx9/",
"text": "Encouraging MOM HUG. Take your own path. Their life is not yours. NW is a great school.",
"author": "Xaviebug",
"created": 1568232803,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx6ld4": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6ld4/",
"text": "There is nothing you will want to do in your life that Northwestern won\u2019t equip you for or give you the credential to leverage into.\n\nIt\u2019s unfortunate that parents can be this way. You\u2019ve made a great accomplishment and don\u2019t allow anything or anyone to take that away from you.",
"author": "Johnnadawearsglasses",
"created": 1568233219,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx6pxy": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx6pxy/",
"text": "Congratulations. I'm going to a community college. Tell your mom Northwestern is a great school!",
"author": "LonelyMolecule",
"created": 1568233301,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx7gnd": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx7gnd/",
"text": "I\u2019m really really sorry",
"author": "leftymeowz",
"created": 1568233774,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxaauu": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxaauu/",
"text": "dont worry too much about parents, everything you've done up until now is def amazing if you're in northwestern :))",
"author": "goofyisbae",
"created": 1568235623,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxallt": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxallt/",
"text": "i\u2019m so sorry this is happening to you, Northwestern is such an amazing school with spectacular people and academics. Really at the end of the day, it\u2019s all about what you do after college. I wish you the best of luck!",
"author": "yvesavlaurent",
"created": 1568235823,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxclry": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxclry/",
"text": "Speaking as a parent, that\u2019s fucked up, and Northwestern is a GREAT school. I\u2019d be so pleased if my kids got in there. Your mom\u2019s Harvard hangup is HER hangup. Don\u2019t let it get to you.",
"author": "Redshirt2386",
"created": 1568237179,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxcy3d": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxcy3d/",
"text": "My parents are the same way but w Georgetown. I could literally get in to a higher ranked school but if I don't go to Gtown and follow their legacy I've failed. I'm really stressing abt college apps and I hope I get in cuz it is a good school and I want to get in but if I don't I don't know how they'll react. Sorry u had to go through that man, northwestern is an amazing school and you should be super proud!",
"author": "OGSHAGGY",
"created": 1568237416,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxgvjw": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxgvjw/",
"text": "Confront her and make her feel guilty",
"author": "seniorthrowaway00003",
"created": 1568240162,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxq29q": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxq29q/",
"text": "You sound like me from the future",
"author": null,
"created": 1568246758,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxrsyt": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxrsyt/",
"text": "Brooooo I\u2019m transferring into Northwestern this year. Tbh know quite a bit of Harvard kids and I think we\u2019ll have a pretty incredible experience at NU",
"author": "AzKesh1",
"created": 1568248020,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxtosx": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxtosx/",
"text": "Northwestern is ranked #9 by US News and World Report... I think your admission there says you\u2019ve done amazing in your studies! Congratulations! In my opinion, you should respect your parents\u2019 opinions but also shove their negativity down the drain. Be happy! Be proud!",
"author": "vqs5127",
"created": 1568249402,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxv1v7": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxv1v7/",
"text": "yea dude northwestern is complete shit (sarcasm)\n\n​\n\nanyways... congrats on NWU! Hope you love it there. I hope I can make it there",
"author": "alphawater1001",
"created": 1568250395,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxw46q": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxw46q/",
"text": "Yo, a fellow wildcat. I look forward to probably seeing you during WW next week!",
"author": "Mountaingoat49",
"created": 1568251163,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxwost": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxwost/",
"text": "I'm so sorry you had to go through that, but know that Northwestern is a really nice school (both my parents went) Also, you're mom should be happy for you, and you should know that trying your best is all we ask for. Good job for going to college and be proud of your accomplishments.",
"author": "AngelFSN",
"created": 1568251576,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxy4v1": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxy4v1/",
"text": "i feel like it could almost be better this way. The pressure to be that perfect kid would have become even more unbearable. At least now you can establish that you are who you are and you don't have to follow a path that makes them happy.",
"author": "floerae",
"created": 1568252645,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezy15ji": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy15ji/",
"text": "Congrats. McCormick, Weinberg, or Comm?\n\nI was in the exact same situation as you, but with MIT. I got out of it by telling my mother that if she ever wished to speak to me again after I graduated, she would get over it. YMMV, depends on how much confidence you can talk to your parents with.",
"author": "Name_Classified",
"created": 1568254899,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezy1nvv": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy1nvv/",
"text": "This is like the show Sky Castle",
"author": "metallikoh",
"created": 1568255284,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezy74aj": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezy74aj/",
"text": "Yo I'm a sophomore at NU now if you need to talk or have any questions dm me",
"author": "Intelli713",
"created": 1568259771,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx638f": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx638f/",
"text": "r/insaneparents",
"author": "dont_judge_mee",
"created": 1568232896,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx7aep": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx7aep/",
"text": "I would so much rather go to Northwestern than Harvard (and I did!) It is still one of the top schools in the country, and the campus and atmosphere are amazing! Feels so small and quaint even though it's only 30 min from the big city of Chicago! and the town of Evanston is awesome! Again, super quaint and adorable and housing is so much cheaper than anywhere near Harvard. Also, there wasn't this feeling of immense pressure that I would imagine Harvard has, while still having some of the best professors in the world! You're going to LOVE it, OP!",
"author": "Ducks--Fly--Together",
"created": 1568233663,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezx7qix": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezx7qix/",
"text": "It\u2019s hella hard to get into northwestern too.. like in the same category. Honestly if I was accepted to both I\u2019d go to northwestern",
"author": "baseball212",
"created": 1568233952,
"upvotes": 1,
"replies": {}
},
"ezxabg9": {
"link": "/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/d2v05v/i_overheard_my_mom_crying_on_the_phone_today/ezxabg9/",
"text": "I hope your mom gets over herself and realizes how awesome you are and is able to show you how proud she is of you. She's probably feeling emotional about you moving away and maybe that's affecting her common sense a little bit as well (as in, a small disappointment that you didn't get into Harvard turned into the bigger thing where she was crying because she's also feeling sad about you leaving). In any case, I hope you have a fantastic time at Northwestern.",
"author": "rubyreadit",
"created": 1568235634,
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